When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
