STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize