are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Ketchup is God's man juice
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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