let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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