There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
