My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
