so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
