eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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