I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
