We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
