My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
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