I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
