coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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