Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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