Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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