I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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