So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Randomize
