Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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