Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
