Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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