i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
