Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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