Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
