I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize