SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
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