There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
