apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Randomize
