i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
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