Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
