Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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