i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
