he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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