I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Randomize
