C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Randomize
