I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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