So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
