Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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