There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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