hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Randomize
