yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
It's never too late to be topless.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
