Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize