Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
