Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize