it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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