There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
