And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I think a kid would responsible me up
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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