you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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