I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
