walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
