please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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